Like seek a job where you get paid?

“Bonuses in JPM’s prime brokerage were cut 75 percent (department-wide average). They tried to tell us the 75% was across the board in IB though obviously that’s not the case. There’s expected to be a mass-exodus from PB in the coming weeks, which it sounds like management is hoping for…”

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker

Numbers out today.

Apparently IB bonuses are “20% down at the senior management level, 10% for the absolute peons, and 10-15% for everyone else.”

That’s all we know for now, let us know if there’s anything you’d like to get off your chest.

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Lest there be any confusion about what’s coming…

“FYI: Division heads spent yesterday telling people to expect, and I quote, “very austere bonuses.” Not just austere, very austere.”

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Intel is giving four times the usual bonuses for its employees thanks to its record year with $43 billion in revenues. The company is also paying its workers the equivalent of 3 extra days of work on top of that.

The higher bonuses cap a year when many Silicon Valley companies offered raises or bonuses to employees to keep talent from being poached. Google said it was giving all of its employees a 10 percent raise back in November, partly because it had to fend off poaching by the faster-growing Facebook. Hewlett-Packard chief executive Leo Apotheker also gave HP employees raises after an era of cost-cutting under previous CEO Mark Hurd.

In Twitter messages, Intel employees are saying things like “champagne (er, sparkling cider) popped.” Tech company employees are going to be happy. And those that don’t get bonuses? They may walk down the street to the next employer. At Intel, all employees get bonuses based on a given multiplier every year. This year, the multiplier was 4X. In addition, every six months employees get profit sharing based on a number of days.

Tags: bonuses, talent war

Companies: Intel

People: Paul Otellini

Article courtesy of VentureBeat » deals

Earlier this morning across the pond, Bob Diamond told the House of Commons Treasury Committee that while payouts will be distributed “responsibly,” Barclays employees will be awarded bonuses that reflect the work they’ve done this year and will not be dictated by some arbitrary cap. Why won’t BD listen to the repeated calls from the government and the people to limit pay? Because to do so would in essence be saying “sorry, we were wrong,” and guess what, Bub? The days when Barclays would get down on its hands and knees and beg for forgiveness from the masses are over. “There was a period of remorse and apology for banks,” Bobby said. “I think that period needs to be over.” And while we’re on the subject? Remind Bob again why exactly an institution like Barclays should even be apologizing for in the first place? It’s just not exactly clear to him given that you seem to have two types of banks in the UK- the kind like Barclays, which did nothing wrong and the kind like RBS, which can’t do anything right. And yet, they’re treated one and the same.

Mr Diamond was repeatedly pressed to express gratitude to UK taxpayers for Government support for the sector. “We are very appreciative of all of the moves that were taken to ensure we still had a financial system,” he said. “On the other hand, there are 150,000 people at Barclays, we never failed a stress test, we never put the system at risk — we never took a single penny from any taxpayer around the world.”

So here’s what you can expect moving forward (warning you now so you can’t act surprised later):

1) No more apologies.

2) Bonuses that may in some cases include 7, 8 or 9 figures. Why? Because Bob and Co are adults and they can do whatever they want!

3) Sweet, sweet risk, as far as they eye can see (“It’s in the best interests of everyone in this country that we shift the mantle of growth to the private sector,” BD said. “We need banks to be able to take risk, working with the private sector in the UK.”)

Bob Diamond: Bankers Should Stop Apologising [Telegraph]

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THEhotel at Mandalay Bay has recently opened Top Chef contestant Hubert Keller’s new restaurant, Fleur. The menu includes a burger priced at $5,000 (which comes with a $2,500 bottle of wine, so manage your expectations about what this mere $2,500 piece of meat will taste like now) and Fleur representatives optimistically believe they’ll sell 6 of these things this year.

Sure, bonus expectations at banks this year are not great. But, a) they could surprise on the upside b) you could be one of the top performers whose number balances out those getting zero dollars or c) you could work at a hedge fund or private equity firm where people are getting paid. Should one of those scenarios apply to your life, will you be the idiot go who goes for it? Will it be your drunk co-worker, after winning a few bucks playing Black Jack? Will it be George Soros buying and forcing the chef into a blind taste test in an attempt to prove you can’t tell the difference between the burger for 5 g’s and a Big Mac with a couple truffles thrown on top?

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker

Mark your calendar, ladies:

Supposedly Goldman Sachs’s bonus numbers- i.e. the most important figures in the world and those by which all other bank employees measure their self-worth- will be officially communicated January 20th. Will the day end in tears of joy or the kind used as lube to JO&C? Stay tuned.

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker

Despite just last month receiving the official word that bonuses will be down ten to thirty percent (at best) this year, Morgan Stanley employees have been girding their loins for the bad news since at least September. With a few weeks to go ’til real numbers are communicated, they’re at the ‘just rip it off already’ stage. And bonuses are not the only thing they’re waiting on.

“FYI, we also haven’t heard anything on promotions (which normally happen before Christmas). Apparently they’re going down around the same time as bonuses this year. Countering bad news with good or just giving out all the bad news at once?”

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker

Let the people decide.

All the major banks – Lloyds Banking Group, Royal Bank of Scotland, HSBC and Barclays – are understood to be in discussions with major City investors about the performance criteria for 2011.Banks are embarking on a radical overhaul of the way they pay their senior executives by considering how they can link their bonuses to the way they treat customers and build up capital.

The move is a major departure from the traditional way of paying out bonuses, which has been done on the basis of how the bank’s share price has performed relative to rivals, and the institution’s profitability.

Bank Bonuses To Be Linked To Customer Satisfaction [Guardian]

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker

Or the 32 percent who think their number is pretty fair? Or the 56 percent who think they should get more? Or the 9 percent who don’t want to talk about it? You’re in a safe space— open up. (Related: apparently a higher percentage of the men than women polled thought their number was unfair, if you can believe that.) [Esquire]

Article courtesy of Dealbreaker