As a tribute to Dennis, let’s all share our favorite moments over the last few years. I’ll start.

Most of you are going to go with his late-night breakdown two summers back but the following is my personal fave– the time Charlie Gasparino asked Dennis if he used hookers, which DK did not appreciate.

This one was also enjoyable.

Dennis Kneale To Join Fox Business [TV Newser via BI]

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Oh look, the Dow hit 11k. As this is marginally exciting news for at least one, perhaps two people, we’re going to play Call the Close. Closest without going over wins, and as a bonus question, please also guess how much Dealbreaker friend Gianna Beamers took in in tips last night. Nail both and you’ll score yourself a choice of one “idea dinner” with Lenny Dykstra or a series of lunches with Charlie Gasparino, who will read aloud to you from his new book.

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According to Charlie Gasparino, “there will be fairly significant cuts” if “the fourth quarter mirrors the third quarter.”

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Recently, Mike Mayo has gotten into a bit of public with Citigroup. To recap, a few weeks back, the analyst started telling clients and whoever else will listen that the bank is inflating its profits and needs to a write down $50 billion of deferred-tax assets. For the offense, Citi apparently froze Mayo out, denying him any and all access to Vikram Pandit. This, being the worst thing you can do to a person, made Mayo hit harder, musing that maybe we can’t trust Citi at all. Somewhere along the way Charlie Gasparino got wind of all this and made it public, meaning Citi had to be all, “Mike Mayo? LOVVVVE him. There’s no freeze out, Vik’s just been really busy finalizing his fantasy football team, is all.” Citi has graciously extended an offer for Mayo to come over on October 1, which he’s accepted, at which time they probably think a little face time and sweet talking from Uncle Vik will be all that’s necessary to get Michael to upgrade Citi to “fucking awesome” in his book. According to Charlie Gasparino, that may not be the case. Mayo’s next note will more likely be along the lines of “we are about two quarters from consigning this dump to the scrap heap of corporate history.”

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Short version: va fangool. Longer version:

Earlier: From Whom And How Does Charlie Gasparino Get His Scoops?

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A couple days back one of Charlie’s former colleagues and I had a conversations re: if absolutely forced to pick between two former and current CNBC colleagues with which to liaise, who she’d go with. She went with option C, which was that she’d have to kill herself or go on life-support. I suggested the situation might still be appealing to Charlie Gasparino. Today he responded to that discussion on-air asking “She’s gotta be comatose?” and adding “She’s gonna be comatose” before his mic was cut. I’m not even sure what any of this means (was he saying he’s going to put her in a state of comatosis via his schlong?) but regardless I’m nervous.
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$$$ Detection Dogs? Hunting Bedbugs Goldman Sachs ‘Mystery’ [Post Chronicle]

$$$ Medvedev Sees Risks for BP, Euro [WSJ]

$$$ Katie Benner: S&P president: credit ratings matter, shouldn’t be mandatory [Fortune]

$$$ Charlie Gasparino: BP Bond Deal Would Be Difficult [FBN]

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Yesterday, the Post had an item about Snooki and Gregg Valentino, a man with 28-inch biceps and author of the book Death, Drugs and Muscle, becoming fast friends. What the story failed to note was two very important facts: 1) Valentino is said to getting his own reality show this summer and 2) he is the noted gal-pal of Charlie Gasparino. Don’t do anything with that info for now, just keep it in mind, and wait.

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$$$ Which Banks Hold Europe’s Troubled Loans? [NYT]

$$$ Charlie Gasparino: Feinberg’s Not Done Yet [FBN]

$$$ Tweets On The Street [The Deal]

$$$ “Photo1’s last day at JPM inspired talk of icing him before he left; Photo2 went to get a Smirnoff, but Photo1 was prepared for the worst and had been carrying an emergency Smirnoff Green Apple all morning. They proceeded to do the honorable thing.”

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Needham analyst Charlie Wolf this afternoon launched coverage of Nokia (NOK) with a Hold rating, asserting that the company is “increasingly vulnerable” to loss of share in the smart phone market.
“Although it has a dominant share in the mobile phone market, Nokia has fallen behind the innovators in the smart [...]

Article courtesy of BARRONS.com: Tech Trader Daily